Jan 22


7:08 am – I didn’t wake up in the middle of the night to record my dream, as I usually do.  I assume that to be effect from sleeping pills and alcohol. This is my best recount.

I’m on a cruise ship with most people in my life…as well as many others I don’t know.  At some point, it becomes clear that we are facing the end of the world – tonight.  But it won’t be a huge catastrophe like a nuclear holocaust or anything.  People will just start dying soon.  And somehow everyone knows what minute they will die.  My minute of death will be 1:24pm.  I look at my watch.  I have a couple of hours.

Though everyone knows of their impending fate, precisely, things don’t seem to be as stressful as I always imagined they would be.  There is even a celebration feel to it all.  Rhonda and I discuss inviting another woman to our room for the evening.

(Note: Even though this is a dream, I feel compelled to write to my future self and say that involving someone else in the bedroom has never been something either of us has been interested in or even discussed.  Thanks subconscious.)

I figure out how to adjust my death clock.  I no longer will be dying at 1:24.  My new time is 4:47 pm, and now I am feeling pressured. (more)

I’m somewhere else, watching movies about my childhood with my dad.  I recognize a tropical looking, thatched shed in our back yard where we would store outdoor toys and tools.  I laugh and ask my dad why he would always put padlocks on everything.  “So people wouldn’t still our shit,” he tells me.  In reality, we never had such a shed and my father didn’t padlock everything.

tn_suspect-being-arrestedUpon leaving, I happen into an episode of cops being acted out en vivo.  A Latino man is crying because his dog was attacked by another, larger, dog and ended up dying.  When I arrive, the dog had been attacked but hadn’t died yet.  However, since it is an episode of cops that I have already seen, I know what is going to happen.  I watch the little dog walk around in the snow, bleeding little red droplets everywhere it goes.  I become sad.

Somehow I’ve lost Rhonda.  I happen into a cafeteria carrying a large, bendable screen which seems to be the new Apple techno gadget.  My mom and grandma are there, and I explain that I am on a cruise with the cast from Gilligan’s Island. Nearby Travis is chopping wood and the back of his shirt is sweaty.  He is impressed about the actors I am with, but disappointed when he hears Mary Ann isn’t among them.  Then he explains to someone I am with that he uses the sap from the wood to create useful things in his life.  I can’t remember what. (more)

I am sitting on a bench next to a guy named Alyn, who I know from 2004 but was never particularly close with.  I stretch out my computer, showing him all the features against the much smaller and inadequate Ipad that he is holding.  Then I realize it is past 4:30.  Soon I am going to die but I can’t remember my exact time anymore and I don’t know where my wife is.

tn_eternal_embrace_513x600I clamor to open Outlook on my computer.  I struggle to find an email telling me what time I will die and become increasingly stressed that I am not with my wife.  “Well Alyn,” I tell him, “I just may be going to sleep here in a second.”  Then I ask if other people have been dying, because I haven’t seen any dead people, let alone the large stacks of bodies from those who have been passing each minute.  But he tells me there have been bodies, I just haven’t seen them.  I seem to know that I am going to die before Rhonda.  Finally I get my email open and send her a message….what I know will be the last message I ever send her.

“Eternal Love.”

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